We discovered a trap door in class today
The Chamber of Secrets has been opened
I CAN SEE FUCKING EYES GOOD BYE CLOSE THAT FUCKING DOOR
NOOO NO lies i see them to
I DONT SEE ANYTHING SOMEONE SHOW ME
OH SWEET JESUS CLOSE THE FUCKING TRAP DOOR
Take the Nope Train to Fuckthatville, real quick.
*plays with tie nervously at job interview*
"Sorry, I’ve never had a job interview and I’m nervous haha."
"That’s okay just please stop playing with my tie and sit on your side of the desk"
Add a touch of life to your outfit by tying your hair back with a very tiny snake.
Costco doesnt fuck around
What the ever-loving fuck
Hi, My name is Junie B. Jones. The B. stands for Beatrice, except I don’t like Beatrice. I just like B. and that’s all.
"Boys laugh at what they put girls through but they won’t be laughing when they are wiping tears off their daughters face for the same reason."-Beyoncé (via neslad1)
welcome to the FEMINIST CULT, today we’ll talk about terrifying topics such as BEING NICE TO YOURSELF and PROPER SEX EDUCATION
"okay bitch you’ve swallowed cum voluntarily, you can take this goddamn wheat grass shot"-
Me out loud to myself at the Whole Foods juice counter (via foxxxynegrodamus)
"GENTLEMEN, WE ARE AT WAR WITH TROY AND MUST NOT DROP OUR GUARD AT ALL"
"sir, the enemy gave us a giant wooden horse"
"oh rad bring it in"
Things that will brighten your day: puppies learning hockey